I’m Two Dope


A braggadocios introduction. This character aims to exaggerate how amazing he is, using drugs as a metaphor for his supposed influence.

I’m Two Dope,
I am every drug in existence,
Every pill, pipe dream, crystal, smoke in mirrors,
and the white joy lurking in the shadows.
I’m as sharp as razors used to divide the stash.
I am the comfort before the crash.
The green cash, clashed with dashes of euphoria.


I’m so dope,
I destroy communities and disrupt families.
I turn your thoughts into fiends.
Convert your brain into a crack house.
I will control you,
Even when you resist, I get the upper hand.
You can’t avoid me or go against my plans.
I’m in the air, circling the atmosphere.
With each inhale, I reign here.
With each exhale, I appear there.
The rebel and the righteous, enjoy me in their spare time.
I’m so dope I silence musicians in their prime.
I ruin careers, I cause scandals
because no one can get a handle.
But I have dedicated fandoms on Tumblr.
I’m every retweet on Twitter.
I’m every heart gathered by Instagrammers.
I’m really liked on Facebook servers;
I guess the relationship is complicated.


Yeah I’m Two Dope,
you have to admit it.
Then get admitted.
Because my rehabs lead to relapse.
I run the world in infinite laps.
I laugh at those that try to quit me.
You couldn’t stop me with all the signs, symbols,
shameful implications, and addictions
that your loved ones deal with.


Jail systems, I call your bluff
I’ll take your bars, beat you over the head with it
Then place my bars over yours
So you can’t climb over it.


I’m so influential, I’m your only hope
I’m the new faith, I’m above the pope
Soon I’ll be climbing to heaven on a rope,
and you’ll see me shining through a telescope.
I’m peace on earth on a piece of paper,
taped together by the measure of one’s pleasure.
So like choirs and choruses, sing it over and over:
I’m Two Dope.

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